"These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. For people who speak thus make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city."
These verses have been running through my mind a lot recently. As I read them, I get stuck on the sentence, "If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return." Wow - can you imagine? I mean, I look back at my past all the time - in fact, when I lived in New York, all I could think about was moving home. Now, I don't regret that at all - especially given recent events in my life, but think of how much more I could have done if I had not been thinking of the land from which I had come.
Look at so many things in life - are you looking back at where you have come from? Do you desire to return to that land? God has a plan for each and every one of us - He has numbered our days. We need to be passionate about where God has placed us in life right now. While I can't claim to have mastered this (because there are days when I wish I was married with a family...or I wish I was back in college without the due dates and assignments), there is a part of me that is really trying to be content with where God has me right now.
Right now, I'm working in a job that has nothing to do with my major, but it pays the bills. I'm living in a small apartment with a friend, but we have a great time living together. I drive a 20-year-old car, but it gets me where I need to go. I have no prospects of getting married, but I trust that God has a plan in all of this. My best friends live thousands of miles away from me, but I'm thankful for the internet - it makes Kansas, Virginia, and Texas seem a lot closer to Oregon than they really are.
If I kept looking back, I would miss the wonder of what lies ahead of me. I would miss the fact that my mom and I are pretty much best friends and I'm eternally grateful for her friendship. I would miss the opportunities that I have with young girls at my church - mentoring and doing Bible studies. I would have missed getting to know my cousins as older children over this past year.
"If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return." Don't you think that there were times when Abraham and Sarah thought that life would have been much easier if they had returned to the land they had come from? I know that there are times I've thought that - "It would be so much easier if ________." "Oi! I miss college! I wish I could go back!" When I lived in New York, I often thought about missing Oregon - I kept thinking about how great it would be to be back in the Pacific Northwest - to the point where I even bought folksy Christmas music. Thinking back on that, I did find opportunity to return - I found a way to come back. If I hadn't been looking to return, where would God have taken me? Would He have brought me back here? Would He have planted me somewhere else? I don't know. I do know that I would not have traded this past year and a half for anything. I was given time with Jason that I would not have had if I had gone elsewhere - God has all of our days numbered, and while I didn't know it, I spent Jason's last days with him, getting to know him, treasuring our friendship. Now, I keep thinking about those days and wondering if he knew how much I loved meeting him for dinner or coffee - even if I only had a few minutes - it was one of my favorite things to push around my schedule to spend time with him. Now, my evenings are empty and I keep thinking that I want to hang out with him, but he is not here. Not that I can return to those days, but I could sit and wish them here more than I should. I could allow myself to wallow in missing my brother, but then I would begin missing all of the things that God has for me now. There are still things that He has brought into my life - people that He has given me as friends - a mother who needs me.
I need to be looking toward the heavenly country - I need to be looking toward all the things that God has planned for me in my future. Let's all remember the examples of Abraham and Sarah - look toward the heavenly country - when we are looking there, all of the other things will fade away and all we will be able to think about was striving to reach that country - striving to please God and bring glory to Him.
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